Thursday, November 29, 2007
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
I am blessed with the best husband a girl could hope for. He is such a good Daddy and he really cares. He comes to all of Emma's and my doctor's appointments and he asks questions and is involved. When I am just too tired or sore, he takes over with the household duties and makes sure that I am resting. In the third trimester I turn into a beast and he is patient and loving with him, letting me tell him he is horrible for getting me into this mess. He always makes sure we are taken care of, warm enough, have our slippers on, and are happy. He encourages me to do whatever I want, start a business, sell jewelry, work for Eli Lily: he has been the backbone and support system in everything I have strived for and will strive for in the future. He is one of those incredible people that people love to be around and everyone gets along with. He still makes me laugh so hard I am scared I may pee myself and I am proud to walk beside him, in every day life, and through our marriage.
I am blessed by Kazoo. She is such a little me, not only with her soft heart that breaks when she is yelled at, but also with her strong will which makes her stick with something if that is what she decides she really wants. She is so much like her daddy in that she is hilarious. She knows how to be a ham and be silly to get people to laugh. She loves to dance and sing, jump and clap, she loves life and hasn't experienced anything bad. My Grandma describes Emma's life in the phrase that "she only knows love", and it is so true. She is growing up to be such a sweet little lady that hopefully will have such a heart for the Lord and helping people.
I am blessed with our house. I love our house. Nick's brother suggested over the weekend that we sell our house and I have no idea why we would ever do that. It is such a gift to us to spend all of our time together in a nice house that is big enough for everyone and all of our possessions, and is slowly beginning to show our fingerprints on its life.
I am blessed with our car. It is such a good little car. As some of you know we were talking about getting a new car with the baby coming and I eventually felt that was so foolish: a family of four should be able to fit into a five passenger vehicle. So we are keeping it and I am so glad we are. There is nothing wrong with our car and we are teaching our children and hopefully leading by example that we don't go and get new things when what we have is still perfectly good.
I am blessed with family. My family and Nicholas' family is now my family and I feel so blessed to be surrounded by people that truly care about me and about all of us. When I feel small and worthless all I need to do is talk to family and I am reminded that they would miss me if I were gone...at least I hope they would (teehee!)
All in all, you can see I am a blessed lady. And I know that I am a blessed lady because I love the Lord with all of my heart and I know that He is watching me. He is my Abba, Daddy, who keeps me under his wing, accepts me back when I have my hard headed moments and walk out on him. He is amazing and has blessed me besides my wildest dreams. Are you blessed too?
Monday, November 26, 2007
Friday, November 23, 2007
Basically this is what it boils down to: I had some bleak, dark, awful childhood moments. This is my time to make up for those times. I am making memories I want now and ensuring that Emma has the best childhood memories one can possibly have. Hope you all have a wonderful weekend as we are officially in the opening of the Christmas season. This is the time I have been looking forward to all year!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Friday, November 16, 2007
The dilemma we are facing this Thanksgiving is the one of traveling. I am in severe pain now with the pregnancy. I can barely get out of bed and my pelvis hurts soooo bad. It hurts to sit anywhere for too long and my legs tend to have that hurt numby feeling from a pinched nerve. I have just expected that I am going to have to just suck it up and travel the some three hour trip to Nick's sisters house. Now however my absolutely wonderful husband is saying that we are not going if I am going to be in pain the entire time. Yikes! I tried to tell him he could just go without me with Emma, I don't want to hold him down but he doesn't want to go without me. There's no way I am going to be able to fake feeling fine and even if I could it would be a little weird. "Oh yeah I feel fine, the baby must have developed some type of vacuum to float around in as he now feels weightless." Um no. So does anyone have any suggestions? Do I just agree that we don't go? Do I just tell him that we can go and suffer? I don't know and I need your opinion...If it were up to me I would just sit at home from now until the baby is born in dirty sweats.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
They say that being uncomfortable in the last few months of pregnancy is God's way of getting you ready for labor. I have heard people say that you finally get so tired of being tired and uncomfortable that you just want the kid out and you don't care how much pain you have to endure to make it happen. And that brings to me to the actual labor. Lets just get specific here. I have never been in labor. I never had contractions, we never timed. I went to the hospital with Emma and they induced me. And nothing freaking happened so they sent me home. And then they induced me again and again nothing, so I had a C-Section. This time I am going for a VBAC which is Vaginal Birth After Cesarean. I am excited about going through labor which I know sounds weird to those of you who have endured the pains of labor. But after I had Emma I was pretty depressed that I didn't go through labor and it was something that I had to work through. But I would really love to be able to go through labor.
The scary part however is the death factor. I had to sign a sheet at my last doctor's appointment stating that I understand the risk that I, the baby, or both may die in a vbac. Granted the chances are slim. The death part is from the chance that my c-sec scar would tear open (yikes!). The chances of that happening are only 1-2%. And in that 1-2% 1 out of 1000 people die or the baby dies from something catastrophic. I know that there is always a chance of dying in child birth so I am figuring those odds of something happening are about the same odds as if I had another c-section. But somehow having to sign my name to that piece of paper was like signing my life away. I know that sounds weird.
Another reason I think I am so scared of dying is all of the crap I have heard this time around while being pregnant. A friend of mine only had about two weeks left and went in to labor and her baby was born with the cord around his neck. He was alive when he was born but they couldn't save him. Another girl I know told me of her friend who just died a couple of weeks ago in labor when a blood clot traveled from her leg to her heart. I have also been reading multiple stories of women who contracted breast cancer while they were pregnant. I guess I am just scared of all of the factors in the chance of dying. With Emma it was all flowers, hearts, and sunshine.
So that is what has been going on in our neck of the woods, what has been going on with you?
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Picture of the lane going down to the Covered Bridge we explored while Emma napped
This is the place that never ceases to be able to sooth my soul and completely rejuvenate me. It is a miraculous thing. When returned from vacation I found Nicholas and I were teasing one another like when we were dating in college and I felt ready to have this baby. It was as though my heart had said, okay, I am now prepared, lets do this.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Saturday, November 3, 2007
We are also going to be working on the lattice on the top of one of the panels of our fence. Our little yard is surrounded by a cute fence with wood slats on the bottom and lattice work on the top. The lattice on this particular portion of the fence had been entwined with a vine of some sort that basically shattered the lattice after a time. When we bought the house we figured this would be a relatively simple fix, buy some new lattice to replace the old. However after two years of lattice shopping at every lattice supplier known to man, we have discovered that the lattice on our fence was handmade. Oh joy of all joys. So this afternoon Nicholas and I will be outside trying to reconstruct lattice. The problem has been there for the two years that we have owned the home, but I am just sick of it and in the summer it is somewhat covered by the trees, so now as the leaves are dropping you can really see the problem. I am also set on getting it fixed today because the Arts Cafe is tomorrow and people are going to be walking up and down our street to see how wonderful our neighborhood is and we don't need anyone dissing our poor little fence. I am such a geek but I believe that the details are what make the picture perfect.
Other things to accomplish today include going to K-Mart to do a little shopping. There was a coupon in the paper for half off a toy so I am figuring that will be a good opportunity to get a little Christmas shopping done for Miss M.
Dinner tonight will be at the elder Witwer household which should be nice as we have not seen Nicholas' dad in what seems like a millenia. Also Nick's mom and dad have been holding Emma's gross nasty baby doll for ransom down there (not really, but doesn't that sound dramatic) so we are going down there to bust her out.
So those are the things on my to do list today. I will try to report back tomorrow and let you know our progress. Hopefully I can tell you that everything has been done!
Friday, November 2, 2007
I know that everyone is in love with Thanksgiving and everything but personally it has never been my favorite. Probably because I have always spent my holidays being shuffled around from one family to another and now that I am married I am always running from my family to his. Well not this year. I am enjoying Thanksgiving. Ha, ha, ha! There will be lounge pants, and games, and movies after dinner and lots of laughing I presume.
As much as I love November (Christmas preparations, leaves falling, my Birthday) I also hate November (Christmas preparations, leaves falling, my Birthday). Christmas preparations are always fun but I somehow always seem to concoct these outrageous plans throughout the year and then when the time is upon us it either doesn't look like what was in my head or it turns out that to turn my thoughts into reality would be a huge stretch of the budget. Last year I wanted to make these trees out of cranberrys for a centerpiece. Except that a large amount of cranberrys turns out to be quite expensive and it required a ton of pushpins with a white head. However no one sells white push pins except for a florist, who was happy to sell me some, but at the cost of $12.00 for a small box. Next idea please.
Leaves falling: Nicholas and I seem to have differing perspectives regarding leaf pickup. When I was growing up as many of you know, my parents live in a rural area and leaf pickup consisted of raking what you could and having to burn it. I always hated how things just looked to dirty when all of those leaves were on the ground. So I always wanted to have a house where there were no leaves anywhere when they were picked up. Nick on the other hand is content with letting them sit until "they are all off the trees" which I think would take until Christmas which at that time the impending snowfall would be a burden to leaf raking efforts. So to conquer this difference of ours this is what I did and maybe you other wives can follow suit: Living in the city our "yard" consists primarily of landscaping. And I hate when leaves are in the landscaping. So I took Emma out and I raked all of the leaves out of a large portion of the landscaping. This in turn ended in huge piles of leaves in the actual lawn part of our yard. So Nick then raked them to the curb for leaf pickup. I think this system worked nicely for us. It would be a good one to continue except for the fact that I am zooming into my 9th month of pregnancy like a cow trying to run a marathon.
My Birthday: oh how I love Birthdays. They are just so fun and make you feel like such a little kid. I love the surprise of getting cards in the mail and presents when you least expect them. My time of the year for Birthdays kind of sucks though as it is close to Christmas so we are always saving for Christmas. This year though we are going to Brown County for my Birthday present so that should be wonderful. Birthdays are always so depressing though. Each year I have this time when I look back at my 26 years and realize I have done nothing significant. Will anyone remember me when I am gone? I also look to the future and realize how fast the years go by and feel so sad that it feels there is hardly any time left. The kids will be in school, then out, then gone, and then we are just kind of waiting for the end. I just want to make sure I treasure all of the small moments in my heart.