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Friday, July 24, 2009

Crazy Week

I am sorry I have been somewhat aloof lately. This has been the hardest week on me emotionally and physically. In case you didn't know, Calvin is having a hard time talking. I've been up nights tirelessly researching what could be wrong, what I need to do. Nick's been living up to his title of "World's Best Daddy" by looking up how we sign certain things to him. I have also been up nights tirelessly crying, feeling guilty that I somehow caused this, and wondering if I would ever hear that sweet boy tell me he loves me. I know that's selfish but I want to hear it. I want to know that he feels loved and is as happy as his smile indicates.
Monday we (calvin and I) had a 2 1/2 hour appointment with a speech therapist who told me she thinks there is hope. It was like having an angel in my presence: Calvin loved her, she made me feel okay and that I am not a screw up for a mother. We begin intensive therapy when we get back from vacation. I am just so excited to see what can be done with my little man. He also needs his tongue clipped and I think Emma does too so we are going in next week to cross that hurdle.
Nick has a kidney stone...its the size of a marble. So he went in to surgery yesterday to have it pulverized. No matter how minor the surgery is I think when the love of your life goes under its pretty nerve wracking...don't you think? I had to also prepare myself for the worst: he could be bedridden for days and need me to do everything (more than I already do do everything, ha!). So far he's been a little nauseous but we're pulling through. I think this weekend will prove my strength if I don't have him around to help.
Next week we leave for vacation. My guest bed is covered with luggage. My guest room wall is covered with about 15 checklists (1 per bag). As you can see, I am in charge of packing. Please if you know where the Burt's Bees bug repellent has run to in our house I am all ears. Errrr. So I will persevere with that task this weekend...oh how fun.
So I think that's been my week in a nutshell. On top of the laundry, dishes, vacuuming, mopping, deluttering, etc.
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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love that you put it all out there. Thanks for the inside glance into your sometimes chaotic life. Its good to know that the things that I often think, and rarely say, someone else is thinking. No matter what life throws your way, just know you are loved and this too will pass.

Jimmy

Aunt Jan said...

Well, here is the update on the 'other' cousin that did not speak until he was 2. I left Praetorina's house today to come back home. He said to me last night while I was giving goodbye kisses "Will you call me?" I said sure I will call you. He said "okay" Then he said "I am going with you to your house!" I said Okay!! But Mom and Dad said "No way! He says his name is "Torian", and he is two. He speaks in full sentences. And can carry a conservation with you until you think he is really 5 in a two year olds body. He will tell you "You are hurting me!" when he does not want to get into the shopping cart, and he says it loud enough so the entire store can hear! And ever other word is "I HATE YOU!!! (I hope this phase is over soon) So just let Calvin be a litle boy a little longer. He will speak when he is good and ready. And when he does, LOOK OUT!!! We love you no matter what, Calvin!!
Aunt Jan