I think this is the complete opposite of VH1’s best week ever. We went on vacation last week which was wonderful but now seems like a lifetime ago. As hard as it is to go back to work on Mondays it was made even harder when I got a call from Nick at work…he was on his way home as he had just been laid off. Ouch.
Our family is a well oiled machine but when the money stops flowing it all kind of comes to a screeching halt.
I think we are set for 6 months. By set I mean we can pay bills, send Emma to preschool, and get a little bit of food…nothing else.
A lot of things will happen in those 6 months: Calvin’s birthday, Halloween, thanksgiving, Christmas. I am not all about material possessions but it simply kills me inside to know we might not be able to provide for our children in those special ways.
Those of you who are family I am not worried as I know you’ll make the children still have a wonderful Christmas. Its those moments tied to those times that makes my heart break knowing that we won’t be able to provide for them. Things like apple picking, getting a Christmas tree, going to the Walnut Room, pumpkin picking. All of those family traditions the kids aren’t going to get to do this year.
My rational side says surely this can’t last for 6 months. My husband is the smartest person I know. He will fight for his family. But I am sure that’s what everyone else says in this situation.
My freaked out side of me asks what we will do if this lasts longer than 6 months? I mean, when do you put your house up for sale? When do you say “okay we are sinking fast?”
The future is a black hole to me right now, but then I lift my head and realize I am sitting in the palm of God’s hand. He’s stroking my hair and saying “shhh. It’s okay.” Nick keeps telling me this happened for a reason. I’m reminded of the Casting Crowns song that says “and every tear I’ve cried you hold in your hand, You’ve never left my side, and though my heart is torn I will praise you in this Storm.” I know my Redeemer lives, He will bring us out of this.
Our biggest goal right now is to not let the children’s lives be affected. We’ve never been a “lets go to the toystore and buy a bunch of stuff” kind of family so hopefully it won’t be very hard to keep things the same.
Please know I am not writing this as a “oh feel sorry for us” type thing. Rather I would love to have prayer backers behind us. The power of God is going to move mountains…He’s going to give Nicholas the most amazing job and He’s going to take care of our family! Amen. So please be praying for us. Lift us up any moment you can so we may be cloaked in prayer. Thank you so much in advance.